So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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