god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
