all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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