Don't make out with my wife yet
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
