I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
babies were throwing up all over the place
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
