took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
