Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
