He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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