so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I can't put those talents on a resume
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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