do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Randomize
