I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize