Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize
