no. you can't hotbox the world.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
