dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
