Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
