Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Randomize
