I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Less talking, more tequila
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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