Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
You are a genius and a whore.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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