ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
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