don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize
