i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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