your room smells of hookers.
And success
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
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