Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I just threw up on my dentist
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I AM VODKA MAN
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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