its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Never joke about your clitoris.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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