I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I am available for nakedness
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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