someone threw a dead crab at me
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Randomize
