omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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