i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
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