wrigley field is MILF paradise
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
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