do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Randomize
