these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
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