I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
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