whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
