Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Randomize