..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
