I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
