i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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