i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I want to walk on stilts...naked
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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