I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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