I feel great
I just peed on a car
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
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