Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
