Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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