normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
