He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Randomize
