Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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