Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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