i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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