Porn is love you can see.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
