Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize