Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
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I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
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and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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