Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
